-- SeRAph^m ApH3m3r^s+ --

Monday, May 28, 2007

Lame Jokes...

In Lebanon , men are legally allowed
to have sex with animals, but the
animals must be female. Having sexual
relations with a male animal is
punishable by death.

(Like THAT makes sense.)

In Bahrain , a male doctor may legally
examine a woman's genitals, but is
prohibited from looking directly at
them during the examination. He may
only see their reflection in a mirror.

(Do they look different reversed?)

Muslims are banned from looking at the
genitals of a corpse. This also
applies to undertakers. The sex organs
of the deceased must be covered with a
brick or piece of wood at all times.

(A brick?)

The penalty for masturbation in
Indonesia is decapitation.

(Much worse than "going blind!")

There are men in Guam whose full-time
job is to travel the countryside
And deflower young virgins, who pay
them for the privilege of having sex
for the first time.
Reason: under Guam law, it is
expressly forbidden for virgins to

(Let's just think for a minute; is
there Any job anywhere else in the
world that even comes close to this?)

In Hong Kong , a betrayed wife is
legally allowed to kill her adulterous
husband, but may only do so with her
bare hands. The husband's illicit
lover, on the other hand, may be
killed in any manner desired.

(Ah! Justice!)

Topless saleswomen are legal in
Liverpool , England - but only in
tropical fish stores.

(But of course!)

In Cali , Colombia , a woman may only
have sex with her husband, and the
first time this happens, her mother
must be in n the room to witness the

(Makes one shudder at the thought.)

In Santa Cruz , Bolivia , it is
illegal for a man to have sex with a
woman and her daughter at the same

(I presume this was a big enough
problem that they had to pass this

In Maryland , it is illegal to sell
condoms from vending machines with one
exception: Prophylactics may be
dispensed from a vending machine
only "in places where alcoholic
beverages are sold for consumption on
the premises."

(Is this a great country or what?
Well, not as great as Guam !)

Banging your head against a wall uses
150 calories an hour.

(Who volunteers for this stuff?)

Humans and dolphins are the only
species that have sex for pleasure.

(Is that why Flipper was always

The ant can lift 50 times its own
weight, can pull 30 times its own
weight and always falls over on its
right side when intoxicated. (From
drinking little bottles of???)

(Did the government pay for this

Butterflies taste with their feet.

(Ah, geez.)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its


Starfish don't have brains.


And, the best for last?

Turtles can breathe through their

Swtzzz... =.=''


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